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ONE Month of Jackson James

Our little dude Jackson is officially one-month-old. Summer has arrived and we are just so dang busy with our sweet children.  Reagan is officially on a toddler tear of wanting to do a new activity every five minutes and Jackson wants to eat ALL THE TIME!!! But you know what they say, “Hands FULL, Hearts FULL,” and we definitely have our hands full.

I am so excited to do monthly pics of our little man. Watching him grow, change, and capturing each little smile and baby roll is just AMAZING!!!! It was a lot of work to capture 12 months worth of photos of Miss Reagan, but now I look back on all the tiny changes and am simply blown away by how much she has grown. I’m so thankful I took the time to do them.  Again, time is passing much too quickly and I want to enjoy these little moments and capture who our little dude is in this moment!!!

one month old newborn

PEDIATRICIAN CHECK UP & GROWTH: The little dude went in for his one month check-up and we were just blown away at the weight this man is putting on. He came into this world starving and literally hasn’t stopped eating since.  He is almost a whole pound and a half bigger then Miss Reagan Marie was at this age. He currently weighs 9lbs. 6oz. and is 21in. long.  Our pediatrician was very pleased with his progress.  Its been so nice to feel comfortable breastfeeding this time around and to not stress over being able to produce enough milk for him. We nurse when we want to, I’m pumping 3-4 times a day, and then we supplement with formula if we need to.  With Reagan I was so worried and freaked out about being able to breastfeed.  I never could tell if I was making enough milk and then there was the PAIN. Breastfeeding Reagan hurt like a “B.” Social media and “the PERFECT Mommas” out there put so much pressure on new moms to breastfeed exclusively.  I stressed and stressed over doing the best thing for her at the time.  Now, I just let it go and do what is best for me and  the little man on whatever particular day we are trying to get through. He is gaining plenty of weight and we are both HAPPY!

EYE COLOR, HAIR LOSS, & GOOFY FACES:  I see so much of Reagan in him and yet they are both so different.  Sometimes he’ll make a face or turn his head a certain way and I swear I’m looking at my baby Reagan.  His sweet face and soft eyes just melt my heart.  He definitely has Reagan’s nose but the face shape and eyes are a little different.  Reagan is very round, like her Mommy, and our little dude is long and lean with an angular face like his Daddy. I have big round eyes and when he is nice and awake, doing tummy time, or playing he’ll open his eyes nice and big as well.  They are so bright and beautiful and I can just see him working on things and trying to make out different dark or light shapes.  I absolutely ADORE his awake face and can see so much life in his bright eyes. They are super dark blue and haven’t really changed much since birth.  We are so excited to see if they stay blue like his sister, or go hazel or green like his parents.

He came into this world with the softest dark newborn hair that had a slight auburn tint.  I remember sitting in the hospital stroking his tiny head and just loving the soft feel of his hair. When i’m flipping through his newborn photos, which can be seen HERE, I can see so much RED in his hair.  Right around three weeks he started losing all his newborn hair.  Reagan came out of the womb bald and stayed that way until almost her first birthday. I had no idea what to expect and after doing a little Mommy research, aka, I googled newborn hair loss, I learned this is completely normal.  As you can see in his monthly photos, he looks like a typical bald newborn baby. But he has kept all his hair in the back.  So weird.  I think he may have a mild case of cradle cap which is also extremely common in newborn babies.  I first noticed the faintest dryness on his scalp and that was coupled with the hair loss.  Hair will always grow back so I’m not super worried.  We’ll check in with our Pediatrician at his two month appointment and until then I’m not going to stress about it. He is still the cutest and sweetest little dude I’ve ever seen. Such a handsome boy.

He has a very expressive face and the sweetest eyes. He purses his lips, opens his eyes big and wide, and extends his neck out. It is by far my favorite expression of his so far and we are calling it his signature pose. He has given me a few small smiles and my all time favorite, sleepy newborn dream giggles.  Reagan used to do it as well and I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT.

one month old newborn

SLEEP: On night one Jeffrey and I were sitting in the hospital counting our blessings on the birth of our new baby boy, but secretly we were thinking WE TOTALLY SCORED. Jackson was sleeping in five hour stretches consistently and we simply couldn’t believe it. We couldn’t get over how awesome and chill he was. The first three days of his life we slept so good and I almost felt fully rested and recharged after giving birth.  Well, reality hit us both pretty quickly and he soon settled into a steady 3-4 hour pattern of eating and sleeping.  He was still an extremely content, peaceful, and easy baby but was definitely waking up on a normal schedule now. Other then a handful of days, mostly triggered by us breaking his routine, he has stuck to the same nighttime feeding and sleeping schedule.

We learned our lesson with Reagan and only swaddle him up tight when its bedtime.  He gets a bath, fresh jammies and a hat, and a fresh swaddle blanket every evening right after we put Reagan down at 7pm.  He eats, sometimes we nurse and sometimes he gets a bottle, and then after some burping and LOTS of rocking he’ll settle into his big sleep stretch for the night. With Reagan we were waking up almost every 2 to 3 hours and would switch the night shift feedings. Jeffrey would stay up late and do a late shift and then I would wake up in the wee hours of the morning and do the remaining nighttime feedings.  He goes down around 8pm and will pretty consistently sleep until 1:30am or 2am.  If we are off schedule then he’ll wake up around midnight. He has a rough patch every morning from 4am to 5am and is usually working on gas.  He is still asleep but is so noisy and loud grunting and farting every few minutes.  Such a little BOY!!!! It always wakes me up and then after 5am he is all good again and will stay asleep until 7am.  Jeffrey does the 1am to 2am night feeding and I am up at 4am everyday listening to him work on his gassy tummy or rocking him, burping him, or trying my darnedest to help him get comfortable and back to sleep. Sometimes I try and go back to sleep or I just stay awake and PUMP. Always always pumping.  It never ends.

We are still working on a daytime napping routine and haven’t found our grove yet.  I keep trying to remind myself that he is still brand new and I need to lower my expectations on getting him to nap consistently.  I do feel confident that we are slowly falling into a routine and I know we will get there eventually. I literally winged it with Reagan and she is an absolute PRO at sleeping through the night and going down for naps. She never makes a fuss and she is almost always on cue for when naptime or bedtime rolls around. We used the “cry it out” method, after a few months with Reagan and she started sleeping and napping pretty quickly. We found that keeping them on a consistent schedule, helping them learn to self soothe, and keeping their little bellies full are the keys to getting them to sleep and nap.

one month old newborn

SCHEDULE:  I don’t really have a set schedule at the moment. I really wanted to give myself some leeway in the early days and working on staying focused on being happy, loving the babies, and sleeping as much as possible.  I also LOVE having a clean house and cleaning is a major stress reducer for me, so I’m making this a priority as well.  Other then that, we are shooting for a few daily activities for Reagan, lots of tummy time for Jackson, maybe a walk for mommy and the dogs #byebyebabyweight, and naps sprinkled in. This is the base schedule that we fell into for month one. We have lots of Summer activities coming up so I know this schedule won’t last for long. But for now, this is what we are rocking.

4:00AM to 6:00AM – Wake up with Jackson. His morning is really unpredictable and he will wake up anytime during this window. Reagan is still sleeping at this point and my main goal is to get the little dude nice and content before she wakes up and starts going a million miles an hour.  I feed the baby, change his diaper, we cuddle, and then I pump to get my supply up.  This has really paid off big time and my supply is picking up. As long as I can get this first morning pump out of the way then I don’t feel quite so stressed in the morning.

7:30AM – Reagan wakes up. I get Jackson settled in the bassinet or a boppy on the floor and then go get little Miss out of her crib in the spare bedroom.  Eventually we will have the kids bunk together, but for now we added a second crib in another bedroom for her to sleep and nap in.  This allows us to feed the little dude at night without waking each other up.  Jackson still sleeps next to our bed in the bassinet and I’m hoping to get him transitioned into his crib soon.

8:00AM to 9:30AM – Coffee, breakfast, and morning playtime for Reagan.  Reagan eats breakfast while I make coffee in the morning. Jackson is such a little cat napper and is still really sleepy all the time. I’m taking full advantage and letting him sleep whenever he wants.  Month two we are really going to try and get him napping on a regular schedule. Reagan loves eggs and goofs off in her high chair while I sip my coffee.  The weather outside has been beautiful but I am struggling with getting outside with both kids. We are slowly finding our grounding and venturing outside.  We got a double stroller which is AMAZING! Now I can walk with both the babies. Its been in the high 80’s to 90’s where we live so wearing Jackson in my wrap hasn’t been an option. Jeffrey will sometimes walk with us in the evening after Crossfit. I can push Jackson in the stroller and he wears Reagan in a hiking backpack. He says its like working out with a 20lb. weight vest so it totally counts as extra cardio. We only do evening walks sometimes because bedtime and dinner get pushed back and we ALL need to be hitting the hay early these days.

10:00AM – Reagan goes down for her first nap of the day.  Jackson is either awake, eating, or sleeping! Sometimes I can sneak in a  quick workout or a shower during this time. Sometimes I just sit in peace and quiet and mentally get my bearings. I love to use this time to make another coffee, work on a blog post, checkout social media, and basically just pretend like I’m not bound by two tiny humans.

11:30AM – Reagan will usually sleep for an hour to an hour and a half. When she wakes up, if I haven’t showered already, we’ll take a quick shower and read books and play some more. Finding activities to keep her busy these days is getting tricky. Normally we would go outside and play and just goof off but having a newborn is a complete game changer. We are slowly baby proofing and toddler proofing our backyard and I am getting more and more comfortable taking Jackson outside. I worry about the heat, about Reagan falling or eating something in the backyard, does she have sunscreen on, Jackson is crying in the background because he is hungry, and now my boobs are leaking because he is crying. So…we just give up on going outside altogether and shoot for having some cheddar bunnies and feeding the baby.  Then we sit on the floor in the living room and sing the “Itsy Bitsy Spider” for the 826th time until its time to eat lunch.

12:30AM to 1:00PM – LUNCH!!! YAY!!! We are officially halfway through the day and its almost nap time again.  I’ve been up since 4am and if only one of the kids are crying at this point…then its a good day!!! Reagan gets corralled into her high chair and Jackson does tummy time on a blanket in the kitchen while a figure out something for lunch.  These days I’m just eating whatever I can get my hands on and that is usually whatever Reagan is eating.  We make it work. If I stock the fridge with only healthy fresh foods then we both end up eating healthy. She is also getting more teeth so our options are slowly expanding. Jackson is just along for the ride.

2:00PM to 2:30PM – Reagan goes down for her second nap of the day and Jackson and I take a nap as well. He loves to sleep on my chest and this is one of my absolute favorite parts of the day.  I love snuggling with this tiny newborn baby and if I didn’t have a toddler running around he might be glued to my chest all day long!!!! I already miss his tiny newborn little self and feeling him close and snuggly reminds me that he is still my sweet baby boy.  I know soon enough he’ll be running around and maybe even out pacing Reagan. I’m literally clinging to every moment I can get with him. I want him to feel important and loved just like Miss Reagan.

4:30PM – Reagan wakes up from her nap and that means Jackson and I must get up too. We play a little more and then start prepping dinner while Daddy is at CrossFit. I’ve been trying to keep Jackson awake from this point until his bedtime to ensure he is nice and tired.  Sometimes he takes a mini nap but mostly we practice tummy time, look at black and white art cards, and track objects while Reagan runs around yelling at the top of her lungs.

5:30PM – Daddy is HOME!!! Yay. This means I finally have backup and someone to wrangle Reagan or feed Jackson. Sometimes we go on a long family walk and then come home and have dinner. Jeffrey and I are usually running on fumes by this point and Jackson is getting hungry. Reagan is usually throwing food on the floor yelling “DDDOOOGGG” at the top of her lungs.  She thinks its just hilarious that the dogs come running as soon as she is in her highchair with food on her plate.  Quite the coincidence.

7:00PM – Bathtime for both the kids. Jeffrey gives Reagan a bath and then I give one to Jackson.  He hated bathtime at first but now he loves it.  He is always kicking and moving his little arms.  His eyes are nice and big taking in all the sensations and stimulation.  We alternate with just water baths and washing baths were we use the basic Johnson’s baby wash from the hospital.  His skin is so delicate that we don’t need to wash him every night.  We want to establish a routine and get him used to the idea that bathtime is always followed by bedtime. We read books and get fresh jammies. Reagan goes down and then we feed Jackson and swaddle him up tight. He fights going to sleep almost every night but eventually falls conks out.

12:30AM – 2:00AM – Every night is a little different and we are still working on getting him on a consistent night schedule.  He usually wakes up betweens 1AM and 2AM but will occasional wake early around midnight. Jeffrey wakes up for this first night feeding.  He usually takes about 5oz. to 6oz. of either pumped milk or formula, gets burped by Daddy followed by a fresh diaper. Then we re-swaddle the little dude and he will fall back asleep within 15 minutes or so. He’ll sometimes fight going back to sleep but after a few toots he is out again.

That takes us full circle back to the 4am mark were he is either awake and ready to start his day or we eat again and then go back to sleep for a little longer.  Tough for me to say which I prefer. I love when he goes back to sleep until 7am or so, the extra sleep is glorious. But I love the feeling of being up with him when the rest of the house is so peaceful and quiet. We cuddle, watch the news, and sip coffee. I really feel like I get a head start on my days when we are up early, but then I pay for it in the afternoons when exhaustion hits hard.

one month old newborn

FEEDINGS: This kid LOVE to eat. He is literally eating all the time as evident by his weight gain.  I feel like I’m barely making enough milk for him.  We have no issues supplementing with formula if I can’t keep up with him. I started doing whats called “power pumping” once a day.  After he is nice and full I pump for as long as I can until milk stops flowing.  Then I rest for 10 minutes, pump for 10 minutes, rest for 10 minutes, and then pump again for 10 minutes.  After about 3 days of doing this routine once a day my supply picked up by about 10 ounces.  I highly recommend it along with drinking about a gallon of water each day. He is still out eating my production but at least we are giving it everything we’ve got. In the early newborn days we were exclusively breastfeeding, love that yummy golden colostrum, and then once my milk came in I started pumping to get ahead of my supply.  He quickly became ravenous and now we are just rolling with whatever works. I struggled making enough milk with Reagan as well and quickly gave up on breastfeeding and pumping altogether.  My supply is steady enough to really get him some good breastmilk and then we bottle feed him formula the rest of the time.

MILESTONES, PERSONALITY, & SIBLING LOVE: He has a very calm demeanor like his Daddy. His favorite activity is sleeping on Mommy’s chest, he loves to eat, and when he isn’t swaddled he loves to nap with his arms up by his head.  He is also a big fan of falling asleep during tummy time, hates the boppy so far, loves to look from side to side and is always sneezing.  Dang pollen in the air. We are still learning who he is and what his little personality will be.  He was calm and steady in the womb, wasn’t a big kicker, and always had a low heartbeat. He has been that way since he was born as well. He loves to just hang out with us and hates being left alone in a room.  He is happiest while being held and immedieyly stops crying once he is picked up. He just wants to be a part of the family and loves to be included in whatever we are doing.

We’ve had lots of outdoor time, walks, and he does pretty good in the carseat. He doesn’t seem to know Reagan yet but eventually I’m sure she will be crazy entertainment for him. He loves his paci and will fall asleep almost immediately once swaddled. He is a loud sleeper always cooing, grunting, farting, and doing his newborn giggles.  I’m such a light sleeper that I hear everything. It really is time to transition him to his crib.

I’m loving my Letter Board from Amazon and am so excited to use it for all his monthly photos and updates.  I also love that I can use it in our house for holidays and events etc.  I wanted to do something different for him and all the Pinterest ideas seemed overdone these days.  I can’t wait to make a big photo book with his and Reagan’s monthly pics.  It will be so cute.

Happy ONE MONTH little dude!! You are our precious baby boy and we love you so very very much!

xo xo,

michelle signature

Read about Reagan’s first month and to see her monthly photos click here… “One Month of Reagan Marie.”

one month old babies

Categories MOTHERHOODNEWBORN

Jackson’s Newborn Photos

Motherhood in a nutshell seems to be watching our children grow up way to fast and then secretly crying in our bedrooms at night while looking back at all the itty bitty baby photos of them.  We are already almost through the newborn stage and I am shocked at how big my sweet baby boy is.  As I stated in my previous post, pregnancy and the early days of having a newborn seem like a lifetime ago and we are only five weeks into our new life with Jackson James. I am so thankful that we took the time to have newborn photos done with Jackson and Reagan when he was just 13 day old.

It is so easy to get lost in all the toddler chaos, Summer fun, sleepless nights, endless bottle washing, pumping, and nursing. I find so much JOY in looking back at these photos and remembering the sweetness and love that I have for these two tiny humans! The days feel like they are going by ten times faster then when Reagan was a newborn. I find myself clinging to the little moments with him, wanting to snuggle and just love on him for hours. This of course is only possible during Reagan’s naps and then I officially get NOTHING done every single day. Mommy guilt over who is getting more attention, affection, and one-on-one time is in full swing and I cry on the daily.  I am in a constant emotional battle between deciding to play with Reagan, snuggle Jackson, love on the dogs, clean the house, stay caught up on laundry, or simply breathe. God forbid I should take a NAP for five minutes.  I remembering feeling bored and like a total mom-zombie with Reagan and now I blink and a whole day with both of them has passed before I know it.

The baby days are numbered. Reagan has already changed so much, as well as Jackson, and I know its only a matter of time before they don’t look anything like these photos. Time is going by much too quickly already. I love these little babies with my whole heart. Seeing their sweet expressions and capturing their personalities in this moment, thats what its all about friends!

newborn photos

newborn photos

newborn photos

newborn photos

newborn photos

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newborn photos

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newborn photos

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Jackson James, you are the bees knees little boy. Your momma loves you to pieces and you will always be my sweet special little guy! We all love you and you have completed our family for sure! Biggest THANK YOU to Jenn from Jenn Elliott Photography for capturing my beautiful babies! She is beyond amazing and we just love her.  She is always up for taking on new clients so shoot her a message if your interested in setting up a session with her.  We simply can’t recommend her enough!!!

Click HERE to check out Reagan Marie’s newborn photos as well.

 Navy Newborn Stretch Wrap // Charcoal Newborn Stretch Wrap // White Lace Top discontinued (similar HERE)

xo xo,

michelle signature

Categories MOTHERHOODPREGNANCY

Our Springtime Maternity Photoshoot

Maternity photos feel like a lifetime ago.  Way back when we were a family of three, we had a few maternity photos snapped around 36 weeks.  Its so crazy for me to imagine our little guy all snug and tucked away in my belly.  We also had no idea that we would soon have a perfect little boy to complete our family.  Theres nothing like having a big belly and some gorgeous maternity photos to capture the moment in time.

We had photos taken for our first pregnancy with Reagan in January of 2016 at a local park by our home.  I immediately fell in love with them and will treasure them always.  To check out “Our Wintery Maternity Photoshoot” click HERE.

I was so excited to snap a Spring version for my second pregnancy. We chose the same local park and the exact same location.  I love the contrast between the Winter landscape from our first shoot and the beautiful Spring look from the second.  It seemed special and sentimental to be pregnant again and have the photos taken in the same location.  We walked the same path and literally stood in front of the same bushes, trees, and park bench for both shoots.

I am so in love with this little family of ours and even more in love with my sweet Jackson James boy who was still all cozy in my huge belly.

Maternity Photos 2017

Maternity Photos 2017

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Maternity Photos 2017

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Maternity Photos 2017

Maternity Photos 2017

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Maternity Photos 2017

Maternity Photos 2017

The blooming lilac trees were the perfect backdrop and our amazing photographer Jenn, from Jenn Elliott Photography, completely captured the vintage and natural look I was going for.  I have never been a fan of super staged pictures and love that our shoots are always natural and easy.  We literally just walk around laughing and goofing off together while she snaps away.  This is what we would be doing anyway so it seems fitting to be comfortable and relaxed.

I recycled the Rachel Pally maxi dress I wore to Reagan’s first birthday party and did my own hair and makeup.  I also love that I don’t look like a whale in most of the photos. At 36 weeks pregnant I was super worried that I would balloon out.  We did photos at 31 weeks for our first pregnancy and there is a noticeable difference in my belly size.  Reagan’s outfit is from Gap.com, details below, and is currently on SALE!!! WooHoo.

Lilac Flutter Top // White Stretch Jeggings  // Suede Bow Moccs

Again, being pregnant feels like a lifetime ago.  Life with our sweet Jackson James is awesome, stressful, and so very beautiful.  Some days it feels like there isn’t enough love to go around and then something shifts and everything falls into place. We are beginning to sleep a little more, fall into a solid routine, and are remembering to cherish the small crazy moments. Everyone is getting there love quota each day, including Mommy and Daddy, and general happiness seems inevitable.

I’m excited to share Jackson’s newborn photos and birth story next!!!!!

xo xo,

michelle signature

Categories MOTHERHOODNEWBORNPREGNANCY

Welcome to the World, Jackson James Haguewood!!!

Its official, Baby Haguewood #2 has arrived and we are delighted to welcome a perfectly healthy little BOY into our growing family!!!

Welcome to the world Jackson James Haguewood!!!!

Jackson Birth post

Jackson James was born on May 26th at 7:21pm!!! He entered the world with a LOUD scream weighing in at 7lbs. 5oz. and is 20in. long.  Friday was his official due date, June 9th, and he is already two weeks old.  As with Reagan I delivered at exactly 38 weeks and i’ve taken some time to just soak up every second of cuddles and love from both my babies and my husband.  Sometimes blogging needs to take a backseat.  We are so grateful that he is here and we are slowly settling into a new routine and a new normal with our two wonderful children. We feel so fortunate to have one of each gender and are looking forward to learning who our new little man is.

Jackson Birth post

I had another incredibly easy and quick delivery and am so grateful for this perfect baby boy. He has simply worked his way into our hearts and having him as part of the family seems the most natural thing in the world.  He was always meant to be with us.  I wasn’t sure how the transition to two children would go, but everything has been completely seamless.  Reagan joined us at the hospital shortly after he arrived and was beyond delighted with her new baby brother.  We of course loved seeing her and missed her like crazy.

She, however, was more interested in the hospital room and playing with her Grandparents. I can’t wait till he is old enough to interact and play with her in return.  Seeing my two babies side-by-side is the most magical feeling in the world. I simply don’t know what I ever did to deserve this life and the love of this family…but I am eternally grateful.

Jackson Birth post

Jackson Birth post

Jackson Birth post

At two weeks old Mr. Jackson is the calmest and most content baby i’ve personally ever met.  We got off to a wonderful start with nursing and he barely lost any weight while we waited for my milk to come in.  These first two weeks have been drastically different from our early days with Reagan.  I remember feeling major mommy blues and nursing was a huge challenge with her.  Everything about this little dude is calm and easy.  He does have the occasional fussy moment but that usually means he is a little gassy and it quickly passes.  Our first night home with the little man was crazy easy.  He only woke once to nurse and slept in five hour chunks.  I was shocked and a little worried about how sleepy and content he was. We didn’t know if something was wrong.  Turns out he is just super chill and loves to sleep and eat.  He loves cuddles and being patted on the bottom to fall asleep.  He is quite the grunter and makes the funniest newborn sounds.  I am obsessed with his long fingers and toes and we are convinced he will be tall and lean like my husband’s grandfather!  Basically he is PERFECT and we are so in love with him.

Jackson Birth post

Jackson Birth post

I will share his birth story soon and am so excited to continue blogging about my journey through motherhood and the adjustment to two children.  It has definitely been different but our home is so full of joy and love.  Seeing the HAPPINESS in my husband’s eyes at finally having a son is an indescribable feeling.  We would have loved another little girl, but having a baby boy has filled a gap in our hearts that we didn’t know existed.  He is here now and our family feels whole.  Reagan is just enamored with her baby brother and runs around the house yelling “Ba-by.”  Every time she wakes up from a nap she is calling for the baby and wants to go check on him.  She is constantly peeking into his bassinet and smiling down on him. She lights up every time she sees him and claps her hands and giggles.  I have yet to witness a single moment where she isn’t smiling around him or excited to see him.  We weren’t sure if she would even notice him, being that she is only 15 months old, but she just LOVES him.  I wasn’t expecting that and every time they are together my heart just explodes with happiness.  I can tell they are going to be extremely close siblings.  She is always gentle around him, helps me hunt for his pacifiers, and if we bottle feed him pumped milk she loves to bring us the bottle and help feed him.  She loves her “ba-ba,” code for bottle, and helps him with his.  It is so cute!!!!

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I always here stories from second time moms who say, “I didn’t know if there would be room in my heart for another child.” Or “I wasn’t sure I could love a second child the way I love my first.” I was absolutely positive that our baby would be loved beyond measure and there is no first child or second child, just children to be loved endlessly.  My heart expanded immediately when they first brought him to me and I know that love will continue to grow as we bring more children into the world.

He is so tiny and so sweet. I completely forgot how itty bitty newborns are. It was an amazing feeling to bring another sweet human into this world and my heart is so full of LOVE and GRATITUDE.  The journey is just beginning.  Raising babies into emotionally intelligent and resilient adults requires some serious Mommy kahunas.  I’ve always said that making and birthing babies is the easy part.  Molding these small humans and helping them to grow in love and strength is my true calling in motherhood, and that literally scares the crap out of me.  To do right by these beautiful little souls and be entrusted with their love is the greatest and most weighty journey I will ever undergo.  I pray for their health, wellbeing, and eternal happiness almost every second of every day.  My heart was simply made to love these children.

I will update shortly with more baby news, but my number one priority at the moment is simply getting to know our sweet baby Jackson and continuing to watch our Reagan Marie grow up!!! Thank you to everyone who has sent their love and well wishes. I promise I will get better at responding to phone calls and messages. Right now we are just loving being hunkered in as a family of four PLUS two golden retrievers and three kitty babies! We have one full house and it is just wonderful!

xo xo,

michelle signature

Categories CHALKBOARDSPREGNANCY

Baby Haguewood #2 – 36 Weeks

36 weeks with baby #2

How far along? 36 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: +23lbs. 

Maternity clothes? YEP! 

Stretch marks? Nothing.  I’m on track with the weight and my belly is about the same size as my first pregnancy. I feel like i’m carrying the same as well. 

Sleep: Some good nights and some bad nights.  I’ve graduated to multiple pillows positioned in a very specific way and then I just flip from side to side with bathroom trips in between.  We also have the AC cranked because i’ve been hot as heck lately at night.  

Best moment this week: With hitting week 36 we are now in the final stretch and are visiting the doctor weekly.  We learned we are still 2cm dilated and are making progress. Slowly inching closer and our doctor seems confident that it could be SOON!

Have you told family and friends? Yep!

Worst moment this week: I realized that I might still go full term and that means 4 MORE WEEKS of pregnancy. 

Miss Anything? Still EVERYTHING!!! I’m so looking forward to my first post-baby cocktail just in time for Summer!!! YAY!!!

Movement: Strange movements and baby is most active when i’m laying down. But Hubby made a good point, this could be because I pay attention more when i’m laying down.  Most days we are so busy chasing Miss Reagan around that I don’t even notice fetal movement until she is in bed. 

Food cravings: No

Anything making you queasy or sick: Not real. Still no appetite but the baby and I are both gaining weight so we are good. I’m almost at the 25lb. weight gain minimum.  I gained 26lbs. with Reagan.  

Symptoms: Rib pain, back pain, a little acid reflux, and an electrical sensation in my pelvis that is the baby hitting nerves as he or she drops. This sensation is usually followed by a Braxton Hicks contraction, which I have multiple times daily, and sometimes a brief real contraction that feels like someone stabbed me in the pelvis with a knife.  I remember when I was in labor with Reagan I was TOTALLY SHOCKED at how painful “real” contractions can be.  I thought I could handle it but boy was I wrong.  The nurse just held my hand and nodded her head saying, “Yep, there is a reason they call it L-A-B-O-R.” I do wonder how men would react to such pain.  I’m just curious.  

Have you started to show yet: YES

Gender prediction: BOY!!!

Labor Signs: I thought my water broke the other day. NOPE. TMI, but yea, it wasn’t water. Enough said. PS this is totally real, unglamorous, motherhood at its finest.  Everyone is so busy “glorifying” motherhood in all its perfection on Instagram and Facebook.  BULLSHIT! TOTAL BULLSHIT.  Real motherhood/pregnancy is peeing yourself and thinking your water broke, being so tired that you don’t shave your legs, and maybe not wearing a bra for like, IDK, a week maybe.  Also true, sometimes I let Reagan cry in her crib because I just can’t handle it and am busy crying myself in my big girl bed.  TRUE LIFE. Being a mom is really hard some days, not all days, but some days.  And I am so thankful that I don’t feel ashamed at crying or asking for help when I get strung out. 

Belly Button in or out? OUT

Wedding rings on or off? On but only sometimes.  I’ve always been in the habit of only wearing my wedding ring when we go out in public. And we aren’t doing a whole lot of anything these days so its mostly off.  My hands are slightly swollen but not too bad. 

Happy or Moody most of the time: I’m feeling all the emotions there are to feel. Mostly nervous/anxious about delivering and what it will be like to have a toddler and a newborn in the house at the same time. I have no expectations about what life will be like with two kids and am trying my darnedest to stay grounded and calm.  I’m assuming that “strung out” feeling with be multiplied by 10, but don’t want the fear of that to overshadow the joy and love we will experience in the first few days and weeks of being newborn parents again. 

Looking forward to: NEXT WEEK, week 37!!! Baby will be considered full term at that point which means we have the go ahead to deliver whenever baby should decide to come! YAY!!!

xoxo Friends,

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36 weeks with baby #2

Categories CHALKBOARDSPREGNANCY

Baby Haguewood #2 – 33 Weeks

33 weeks pregnant baby #2

How far along? 33 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: +19lbs. FINALLY broke the 18lbs. mark.  Keep growing little baby!!!

Maternity clothes? YEP! But clearly i’m still trying to squeeze into my regular shirts, evidence above in pic. My lovely Lulu Lemon tank will be nice and stretched out. But it is so soft and comfortable I want to live and sleep in it. 

Stretch marks? No. Checking obsessively daily!!!! 

Sleep: Sleep is totally whacked out.  Officially beyond uncomfortable. Hubby finally remarked on how much I get up and toss and turn. Apparently i’m interrupting his beauty rest. HAHA. 

Best moment this week: Had a few hours to myself, toddler free, and got my hair done. BYE BYE scary roots.  Only downside is that sitting in a chair for that long is really uncomfortable.  I had to get up and walk around multiple times during my appointment to release the pressure on my back.  I felt so silly in the salon just cruising around.

Have you told family and friends? Yep!

Worst moment this week: Nothing tragic, just the normal pregnancy routine.  Feeling extra emotional this week though.  Also had a minor freak out at whats left on my to do list for baby.  So not like me to be on the ball with this stuff. But I just don’t have the motivation or energy to do anything. 

Miss Anything? Sleep, not having to pee every five minutes AND it would be nice if I stopped having mini leaky pee sessions every time I sneeze or cough.  The JOYS of pregnancy and growing a human :). 

Movement: Movement has been all over the place.  Its crazy how much anxiety this causes me.  The baby either moves all the time or not at all which totally freaks me out. 

Food cravings: Chicken salad, Mexican food, and ice water!

Anything making you queasy or sick: Occasional waves of nausea but its not triggered by anything in particular. 

Symptoms: Normal stuff. 

Have you started to show yet: YEP

Gender prediction: BOY!!!

Labor Signs: No but I have lots of braxton hicks when i’m moving around and the occasional legit contraction if I don’t drink enough water!

Belly Button in or out? Out

Wedding rings on or off? On but slightly swollen. 

Happy or Moody most of the time: Mix of both. Extremely emotional these days and ready to be done. 

Looking forward to: Continuing to check items off my to do list. 

xoxo Friends,

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33 weeks pregnant baby #2

Categories CHALKBOARDSPREGNANCY

Baby Haguewood #2 – 32 Weeks

32 weeks pregnant with number 2

How far along? 32 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: +18lbs. I can’t seem to make the hump over this weight.  I know a healthy minimum is 25lbs.  We still have a few weeks to go. Most weight is typically gained in the last weeks of pregnancy when baby is bulking up. I shouldn’t be complaining about “not” gaining weight. 

Maternity clothes? YEP!  And choices are running low.  I am so thankful I won’t have to extend into a summer pregnancy, but I was looking forward to lots of maxi dresses and flowy baby bump pics.  I suppose that will translate into flowy postpartum maxi dresses instead.  Hoping and praying I can get my post-baby #2 body back quickly for summer bikinis.  The minimal weight gain helps I suppose. I should probably slow down on the Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. 

Stretch marks? No

Sleep: Lots and lots of pregnancy insomnia.  I’ve been trying to drink EXTRA water throughout the day and cut off water consumption after 8pm.  This has helped a bit with the nighttime bathroom trips significantly.  

Best moment this week: I am so proud of myself this week because it has been a tough week, but DAMN, I made it through and my family made it through.  I unexpectedly hurt my back and have been facing some anemic like pregnancy symptoms that have made moving around and feeling good/positive a major challenge. I’ve been in bed and struggling to get around.  

Have you told family and friends? Yep!

Worst moment this week: Awwww I hurt my back and was semi-bedridden.  I have never had any kind of major injury, and i’m not saying thats what this was, but it was super scary.  I have given birth once before but I knew that pain was only temporary.  This was excruciating and beyond the feelings of having contractions.  Plus, I didn’t know how long the pain would last.  Back injuries can go on for weeks and months, and because i’m pregnant there is nothing they can provide for relief like muscle relaxers.  I was just curled up in a ball on the floor crying non-stop from the pain and anxiety.  My mom was so sweet and came and helped with Reagan while I was struggling.  I was able to go to the Chiropractor and got a few adjustments as well as a pregnancy massage to help the damaged muscle and ribs heal.  This made it worse for a few days but ultimately helped the healing process and by the end of the week I was feeling so much better.  I could finally sleep again, was taking multiple Epsom salt baths a day to relieve the pain, and used my favorite Stress Away essential oil to keep calm and breathe away the pain.  I also found the most amazing chronic pain meditation app that I would listen to to take my mind off the pain.  Its amazing how the mind can literally “think away” the physical sensations of pain.  I’ve been using this regularly at night to help get myself to sleep. Having experienced labor and contractions, I can easily say this was so much worse.  My heart goes out to anyone struggling with chronic pain issues.  

Miss Anything? Feeling normal. I’m definitely appreciating that while the final weeks of pregnancy are “uncomfortable,” they are nothing to the feelings of dealing with an injury or chronic pain.  So other than missing a margarita I am just thankful to be feeling better finally.  Its such a relief to know that I can actually ENJOY my final weeks of pregnancy instead of just waiting around to give birth in major pain.  

Movement: Baby #2 is moving sporadically. Baby is much more active in the evening and tends to be quiet and calm during the day. 

Food cravings: Not really.  Eating in general doesn’t sound appealing.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope.  But I did have several puking episodes from the pain I was feeling in my back. 

Symptoms: All the pregnancy “feels” plus a few extras because of the back and rib pain.  But things are looking UP!!!!

Have you started to show yet: YEP

Gender prediction: BOY!!!

Labor Signs: Nope

Belly Button in or out? Out

Wedding rings on or off? On

Happy or Moody most of the time: It was a rough week but I am happy to be feeling better!!!!

Looking forward to: Sunshine and warmer temps. I am so grateful to be feeling better and now I just want to soak up every second of the nice weather we are having.  Mommy needs a tan and the sunshine is lifting my mood so much.  I am getting so excited to meet the little gummy bear growing in my belly and Reagan is excited to be a BIG SISTER!!!!!

xoxo Friends,

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week 32 with baby number 2

Categories CHALKBOARDSPREGNANCY

Baby Haguewood #2 – 31 Weeks

31 weeks baby #2

How far along? 31 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: Still only+18lbs. I was at 21lbs. with Reagan at this point in my last pregnancy. 

Maternity clothes? YEP!

Stretch marks? Nothing yet.  Thank goodness and fingers crossed. 

Sleep: With the help of epsom salt baths and lots of lavender essential oil spray i’m hanging in there. 

Best moment this week: Daddy turned 30 this week.  We had so much celebrating him and everything he has accomplished in his 30 years on this Earth.  Also a bonus, we went on a walk as a family and I was able to chug along for a full 4 miles.  Totally crushed it.  Still working on finding a balance between resting enough and staying active but not overdoing it.  Tricky Tricky Tricky. 

Have you told family and friends? Yep!

Worst moment this week: We went out to dinner to celebrate my hubby and I SOOOOOO BADLY wanted a drink!!! Just to get out of the house, enjoy a nice meal, and relax was completely wonderful.  A nice glass of wine OR even better, a margarita would have been AMAZING. We still had so much fun and Reagan did great.  One of my best pieces of advice to new parents…take your kids everywhere.  Don’t be afraid if they misbehave.  Its good for them to learn that fits and tantrums don’t derail LIFE and we keep on trucking no matter what. 

Miss Anything? I miss having my body to myself.  But I LOVE the feeling of our sweet little gummy bear moving around in my tummy.  Those moments and the weeks are dwindling.  I need to just soak up every second of what it feels like to be growing a tiny human being.  

Movement: BIG rolls and BIG jabs.  Reagan moved a lot but this baby has super exaggerated movements that are huge.  Think Alien type movements were my tummy is distended in two different directions at the same time. Totally bizarre.  The hubby and I watch the baby move in bed at night and are blown away at how different this baby is compared to Miss Reagan. We are so excited to know what we are having.  Only a few more weeks.  

Food cravings: Ben and Jerry’s ice cream!!!

Anything making you queasy or sick: Morning sickness has made another appearance.  Small meals and carbs with every meal make a huge difference.  

Symptoms: Feeling all the pregnancy FEELS! D-Day is coming. 

Have you started to show yet: I’m definitely either pregnant OR hiding a basketball under my shirt 24/7!

Gender prediction: BOY!!! But I really have no idea.  I was so positive during my first pregnancy, mothers intuition and all, that Reagan was a BOY too.  Definitely wrong.  So this time I truly have no idea. 

Labor Signs: Nada but lots of braxton hicks contractions and a few real ones mixed in there as well. All totally normal. My body is just practicing for the real thing, 🙂

Belly Button in or out? OUT

Wedding rings on or off? On

Happy or Moody most of the time: Moody this week.  My emotions have been on a constant rollercoaster and I feel a bit unhinged.  Having a birthday to celebrate and family in town has definitely helped!!!!

Looking forward to: Easter weekend!!!! 

xoxo Friends,

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31 weeks baby #2

Categories CHALKBOARDSPREGNANCY

Baby Haguewood #2 – 30 Weeks

30 week pregnancy chalkboard

How far along? 30 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: +18lbs. 

Maternity clothes? YEP! 

Stretch marks? Nothing yet. I definitely feel a little bigger for this pregnancy and have been slathering on the Mustela Cream still. I think I’m more concerned about getting stretch marks on my bust and tummy at this point.  

Sleep: I have officially accepted that sleep has changed and won’t go back to normal until the new baby is almost 10 months old.  I’m planning out all the movies and shows I will be watching on Netflix and considered getting a Kindle to read during those late night nursing sessions.  I’ve got a pile of parenting books that I am dying to get to. During the day Miss Reagan keeps me on my toes so casual readying is just out.  At night i’m so tanked that I can barely keep my eyes open, let alone read a book.  Night time sleep is restless, full of trips to the restroom, and i’m constantly switching from side to side.  Totally normal stuff and completely expected at this point in pregnancy. 

Best moment this week: We made it through another week and had a successful check-up at the OBGYN.  Everything is looking good and we are just cruising and counting down the days.

Have you told family and friends? Yep!

Worst moment this week: Hip pain, lower back pain, and round ligament pain.  Every time I move or shift from side-to-side in bed, I can hear my hips and pelvis cracking and popping.  This is the point in pregnancy where the body starts producing a specific hormone called Relaxin that softens all the ligaments in the pelvis to prepare for birth.  So much fun.  Its not too bad but does make me feel like i’m 90. Getting in and out of bed id difficult and i’m so grateful that Reagan is learning to walk as bending down to pick her up is getting painful.  

Miss Anything? Everything and nothing.  I’m trying to embrace all the pregnancy “feels” and just remember that this is part of the process of growing a little human.  I see how much Reagan has grown and developed and I almost start crying. Can I get an amen for pregnancy hormones.  Watching her grow from a little baby into a toddler is so magical. She is developing this goofy little personality and is slowly becoming her own person. Knowing I get to see that process in action again is so exciting and makes missing out on sleep and margaritas totally worth it. 

Movement: Baby Haguewood #2 is a little more mellow than Reagan was in the womb.  He/She has always had a lower and steady heart rate, usually in the low 140’s, and moves consistently but not radically.  Reagan always went crazy in my belly and loved moving at night when I was laying down. This baby still moves often but consistently throughout the day.  I did start doing kick counts daily to watch baby’s movement.  

Food cravings: Ice water throughout the day AND ice cream at night.  I’m trying to really pace myself on the ice cream consumption.  I get a terrible sweet tooth in the evening and look forward to eating a little ice cream every night.  Its a bad habit but seriously makes me HAPPY and makes these last few weeks bearable. I’m trying to cut myself some slack and just roll with things.  

Anything making you queasy or sick: Occasional episodes of morning sickness and i’ve noticed when I get upset or feel overwhelmed I get extremely nauseous.  I’ve always had terrible anxiety and actually take medication for it, but this seems magnified in the final trimester of pregnancy. My doctor has me weaning down my meds in preparation for delivery which is slightly stressful.  I’m working on staying calm, practice relaxing breathing exercises, meditation, and warm epsom salt and lavender baths every night make a huge difference.  

Symptoms: All the feels.  

Have you started to show yet: Yep.  Luckily i’m all belly and all baby.  I have noticed some swelling in my legs and feet.  Sitting down and putting my feet up definitely helps.  Water retention has begun as well.  I’ve noticed the puffiness and night sweats that signal oh so lovely pregnancy related water retention.  

Gender prediction: BOY or GIRL!!!! I have no idea this time.  We did finalize our name picks and are so excited for either gender at this point.  

Labor Signs: Nada but lots and lots of braxton hicks contractions. 

Belly Button in or out? Out and tight. 

Wedding rings on or off? On

Happy or Moody most of the time: HAPPY but definitely moments of emotional breakdowns and anxiety.  

Looking forward to: D-Day!!! I know I still have 10 weeks to go but i’m already ready to be done.  

xoxo Friends,

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30 week pregnancy chalkboard

Categories BABY

“Our Little Bunny is ONE” – Reagan’s First Birthday Party

Last weekend I threw little miss an awesome First Birthday Party.  We had so much FUN and the biggest thank you to everyone who gave up their Saturday afternoon to hop on over and celebrate our sweetest little bunny, Reagan Marie.  It was just so much fun.  Normally planning everything is what really gets my creative juices flowing, but the actual day and seeing Reagan so happy made my heart sing.

After Christmas I started searching and searching for cute party themes. I didn’t want anything corny like pink sparkles, and ultimately thats just not Reagan.  She has such an independent and unique goofy personality that I just knew a cookie cutter first birthday wasn’t going to work for us.  Besides, there is no way in hell that I could go for pre-made party decorations. I love a good DIY project and throwing parties and decorating spaces is totally my jam.

Given that her birthday is in March, I knew we had to do something indoors.  We still have like 2 feet of snow around our neck of the woods. Which is so funny, because when I gave birth to her last year it totally felt like Spring with sunshine and green grass.  Such a difference this year. I didn’t want to spend a small fortune on her party and knew I needed to get creative. I found the bunny theme on Pinterest and voila, party perfection!

I gutted out my office/craft room and couldn’t believe the treasures and endless supply of stuff I had snuck away over the past few years.  I raided all my Easter decorations and went to work putting together a party.  I knew the garden/bunny theme would be great for her and I can leave up most of the decor for Easter next month.

Most of the tangible decorations I pulled out of my Easter decor and then I made a ton of stuff using random craft supplies that I found.  I snuck in a HUGE goodwill run full of random crap as well which felt really good.  I’ll try to provide links to things that I did purchase, links to old products if they are still available or something similar, and links to DIY tutorials that I used or made up.  Most of the ideas can be found on Pinterest and I’ll provide the links to the cake stuff I used to build her birthday cake.

I know throwing your child a BIG first birthday is totally cliche these days, BUT it is so much FUN!  I totally get why parents do it.  As a guest, i’m sure its a little boring but we so appreciate everyone who supported us and helped us celebrate our baby girl. We literally couldn’t love her more than we do and i’m sure that was more than evident at her party!!!!

I completely fell in love with the vibrant greens, pinks, and purples, the bright sunlight coming in through the windows and of course all the bunny and garden vintage looking decor! So much fun and so perfect!

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

IMG_0654

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Green Moss Table Runner // White Cake Stand // Jade Cake Stand // Tin Tiered Tray // Gold Polka Dot Paper Plates // Gold Silverware // “Reagan is One” Custom Cake Topper

I opted to go for a light lunch, tons of fresh fruit and veggies, and a dessert bar displaying all her cakes and treats.  The dessert table was so pretty and I was ECSTATIC with how the cakes turned out. It was just a really simple layout on this Green Moss Table Runner and a long end table we already owned. I made her a mini 6″ basic vanilla cake for photos and her little cake smash.  But I ordered a cake from our FAVORITE dessert place.  They did our wedding cake, my bridal shower cake, and multiple other events and birthdays.  It was my favorite white cream cheese cake with rum raspberry filling!!!! SOOOOO GOOD! I also made THESE “bunny tail” sugar cookie truffles, THESE “lettuce” oreo truffles, THESE “carrot” strawberries, and pudding cups with crushed oreo and a carrot strawberry on top!

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

I moved our dining table to the side of the room and used our mirror as a backdrop with some hanging garlands that I made out of old scrap paper. Most of the table decor was a bunch of random mishmash from our house including some old glass vases, mason jars for flowers, craft crates, faux boxwood green balls, and ceramic bunnies from my Easter collection.

Lunch was chicken salad on croissants made to look like carrots with bits of parsley coming out the end, a gluten free and paleo option on beds of lettuce, the yummiest cheese ball recipe HERE, cheddar bunnies, a full garden of fresh veggies, and strawberry, blueberry, and raspberry patches. It was pretty easy other than lots and lots of washing, chopping, and assembling everything right before people showed up. But it seriously turned out way prettier than I had pictured in my head.

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Beverages were strawberry lemonade, fresh cucumber water, and fresh lemon water.  I was going to do champagne but decided not to at the last minute.  My sister and I are both pregnant and we had lots of people who don’t drink at all.  Not to mention lots and lots of little ones and it didn’t seem right to have alcohol for some reason. Totally not like me one bit…must be the pregnancy hormones.

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Bar Cart // Beverage Dispenser // Glass Pitchers

I made the cutest favor bags for our guests and then completely forgot to hand them out to people.  Totally my fault for putting them on the bottom of the bar cart.  Out of sight and out of the way.  I found the cutest vintage bunny graphics on The Graphic Fairy.com and printed them out on basic paper bags with the added wording, “Thank You for Hopping By.” I added a doily, some pink satin ribbon, a white bunny tail, and filled them with THIS recipe for “Bunny Bait” that I found on Pinterest. They were just adorable and the treat inside is so addicting!

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Baby Girls Mint Flutter Dress // Blush Lace-Up Sandals // White Maxi Dress

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Baby Girls Mint Flutter Dress  //  Blush Lace-up Flats  // Bunny Ears Homemade *Tutorial coming soon

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Baby Girls Mint Flutter Dress // White Maxi Dress

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

1st Birthday Setup - Bunny Garden Party

Baby Girls Mint Flutter Dress

The whole party was just spectacular.  We watched a bunch of little ones play together, ate lunch, sang “Happy Birthday,” and watched Reagan go to town on a piece of cake.  The guys played pool in the basement and watched the NFL combine on tv.  It was so low-key and so perfect.  I intentionally went into the whole day with zero expectations on how the decor, food, people, or Reagan’s behavior would turn out. AND…everything turned out so perfect and couldn’t have been more awesome.  These kids parties can get out of control pretty quickly and become all about the parents and the production.  While I might have gone a little overboard on the decor, I never lost sight of the true purpose of the day…celebrating our sweet Reagan Marie.  She is such a little miracle.  It was a fantastic day and again thank you to everyone who came out to celebrate!!!!!

xo xo,

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Categories BABY

Happy First Birthday Reagan Marie!!!!!

It doesn’t seem possible, but our beautiful baby girl turned ONE last week.  We officially have a one year old.  I can hardly remember what life was like before she was here with us, entertaining us on a daily basis.  She has grown from the littlest 6lb. newborn into a full fledged baby girl complete with chubby baby arms, wrist cankles, and michelin man baby legs.  If I could bottle up the chubby baby cuteness I totally would.

Reagan Marie

Version 2

She is such a sassy little goofball and loves to giggle and laugh all day long.  She is such a presence and people seem drawn to her even walking through the grocery store. It cracks me up when she gives her silly toothy grin to random strangers at the grocery store, but it makes my heart happy that she is such a joyful little soul.

Reagan bday photos

Reagan bday photos

Reagan bday photos

Reagan bday photos

Reagan bday photos

On March 2nd we celebrated her first birthday and I kicked off the day by running to the store at the ass crack of dawn to buy her some birthday donuts.  I was going to make her funfetti waffles but ultimately my 7 month pregnant belly wasn’t down for early morning baking and I opted to hit the grocery store instead.  I think she was digging the choice and we sugared her up before the day had even started.  I cranked the tunes and decked out in her new strawberry jammies, we fed her her first ever maple bar donut, a personal favorite of mine and I think now hers as well.

“What the heck is that thing?”

baby birthday donuts

“Seriously, what trickery is this? I’m never allowed to have sweets.”

baby birthday donuts

“Well, it is my birthday, i’m game to give it a go.”

baby birthday donuts

“Hey guys, this is really good!!!!!”

baby birthday donuts

Silence and heavy breathing as she demolishes an entire freakin’ donut before my eyes.

Version 2

“Mom, this is the BEST birthday ever.”

baby birthday donuts

The entire production had me bursting at the seams. Our day together was really low-key and pretty normal.  We played extra hard, took lots of photos, I told her a million times how much I love her and that this is the special day of her birth.  The night before we told her her birth story and reminisced about the crazy night I went into labor.  I really thought I would be super emotional and have a mommy meltdown, but I held it together and just enjoyed every moment of her day.

My mom flew in from Chile that afternoon and she got lots of Grandma love, followed by the arrival of my husband’s parents and even more grandparent love!!!! It was awesome.  We went out to dinner and she enjoyed some salty french fries followed by an early bedtime because Mom had lots of party prep to do still.

I don’t think I left the kitchen the next two days prepping all the food and treats for her party, but it was totally worth it!!! She is such a special and unique little personality and she deserves all the love and birthday goodness in the whole wide world!!!

Reagan Marie, we love you more than there are words to describe or feelings to feel.  Bringing you into this world has been the biggest joy and blessing of our lives and you make every single day so special with your light spirit and happy energy.  We are so incredibly grateful that God blessed us to be your parents and although life is full of ups and downs, we pray that you never lose your happiness.  Hold onto who you are in this world and never compromise your true nature.  I simply can not wait to see the beautiful life you will live. And, if your FIRST YEAR was any indication, life with you will always be an incredible journey.  Thank You for making us parents!!!! Happy Birthday our little darling, we love you so very much!!!!

xo xo, Mommy & Daddy!!!!

michelle signature

Categories BABY

Eleven Months of Reagan Marie

Holy Cow, how in the heck is Miss Reagan Marie 11 months old???

The big ol’ FIRST BIRTHDAY is creeping up on us.  I am so flipping excited for her.  I know parents always talk about how they don’t want their children to grow up and how they should stay little forever…BLAH BLAH.  But, what a cool gig to grow up in this world and I am simply so excited for her to experience everything this life has to offer. She is getting so BIG and so smart.  I love seeing her little brain work out new things and she is getting so vocal and active.

11 months reagan

PEDIATRICIAN CHECK-UP & GROWTH: Reagan is officially 11 months old and will go in for her check-up later this month for her 12 month shots. What a milestone.  I am guessing she is almost 25lbs. now and is the sweetest chubbiest little baby.  She has thigh rolls and chubby baby wrists for days.  She is such a healthy little girl, Thank Goodness.  We’ve actually been taking her out more because we want her to get exposed to all the germs that exist in this world.  Since we don’t do daycare, she really isn’t around other children much and therefore never gets sick.  She is growing every day and seems to change before my eyes. I can’t wait until her check-up to find out where she sits percentile wise.  I know its not super important, but people always comment on what a big, fat, healthy baby she is and I want to be able to say back, “Damn Straight, 90th percentile bitches.” Classy, I know.

11 months reagan

 EYE COLOR, HAIR COLOR, & DIMPLES FOR DAYS: Baby girl is FINALLY getting some hair.  WooHoo! I love long hair and have extensions that I adore!!!! I can’t wait to do cute toddler top knots and braids! Right now, we’ve got a little more then peach fuzz going on, but enough that I can play with it when we snuggle together.  I love stroking her sweet little head and just loving her up.  I know the baby stage will be gone before I know it and I am just soaking up every second of her being tiny and sweet still.  She is a strawberry blonde little gummy bear and I am just obsessed.  I am a natural red head and was carrot orange as a baby.  She is definitely more blonde and we’ll see how it changes as she gets older.  I have a sneaking suspicion that she will keep a reddish tint and might go darker like her daddy.  I don’t see any super red “ginger” jokes in her future but we’ll see.

11 months reagan

SLEEP: Baby girl sleeps like a champ and is totally set in her routine.  I don’t even need to set an alarm for myself anymore because she is up and ready to go by 7am everyday.  I usually hear her at 7am, almost down to the minute, every morning.  I leave her in her crib until 7:30am while I wake up and wrap my head around starting the day.  She plays and talks to herself in her crib.  I love watching her wiggle around and jabber away through the baby monitor.  It really is the best way to start your day.  Her happiness and excited energy are contagious and I can’t help but SMILE every morning when I go in and see her.  She is usually standing up in her crib and gets the biggest smile on her face. Then she lets out a big scream with happy excitement at seeing me.  To be loved and wanted that much by a child is a wonderful feeling. We do a quick diaper change followed by fresh jammies because she often pees through her jam jams from sleeping so hard. Then we head downstairs to start our day.

Reagan is a good napper but the times often fluctuate.  She always takes an early morning nap around 9am and will sleep for 45min to an hour.  Her afternoon naps are all over the place but somewhere from 12pm to 3pm she’ll go down for a 2 hour nap consistently.  When she goes down is totally up in the air and changes daily.  We’ve tried getting her on a schedule but she just isn’t interested.  She sleeps on her tummy with butt up in the air and it is the cutest thing ever.  I’ve tried dozen of times to sneak in there and snap photos but she always seems to wake up. I know i’ll get it one of these days.

11 months reagan

FEEDINGS: Miss Reagan is fully transitioned to table food and pretty much eats whatever we are eating.  And BABY GIRL can eat!!!! She is not shy when it comes to food and literally gobbles down anything we give her.  So far she isn’t picky about anything and loves playing with her food.  At this stage, we are just rolling with it, but eventually we’ll start enforcing that “food is for eating, not playing.”  She loves to throw her sippy cup and knock food on the floor for the dogs. At first it was a big deal and I absolutely hated cleaning up the floor a thousand times a day.  We also don’t feed our dogs people food and were concerned about their health.  But they are fine, Reagan does her thing, and its not worth the battle to observe every single piece of flying food that hits the floor and try and clean it up before the dogs get to it.  Now, they do it for me and I don’t stress about it.  We have remained firm on her feeding the dogs from her high chair though.  They totally take advantage and she doesn’t understand that they can’t eat her food.  She thinks its so fun to hold out her hand full of food, and they come running and give her lots of licks and kisses.  My husband calls her a little drug lord and that she has a Reagan food cartel going on.  Even the cats are getting in on the action and it can get out of hand pretty quickly.  She is slowing beginning to understand the concept of NO and will shake her head “no” at us, but then she does it anyway and doesn’t understand whats really being communicated. Or does she??? I need to start reading up on basic early childhood positive discipline and am fully open to any advice or book recommendations from other parents.  Its a tough GIG and knowing whats normal or expected behavior is totally out of my comfort zone.  I know my child fully and her behavior patterns, but educating and curbing unwanted behavior is new territory for me.

She still takes 3 bottles a day, before naps and bedtime, and we do a mixture of 4oz. Plum Organics Formula and 4oz. organic whole milk.  She is doing great on the transition and will be ready to wean off of formula all together by her first birthday.  I stopped nursing and pumping after a few months so she has had a cows milk based formula for awhile now.  I didn’t want to shock her system so we slowly introduced whole milk in 1 oz. increments and will continue to do so until she is fully off of formula.  I am so EXCITED to not have to mix bottles on a regular basis anymore!

11 months reagan

SCHEDULE: I feel like i’ve already covered a lot of her schedule but here is our basic breakdown…

7am – Wake up and play in crib until Mommy gets her ass out of bed!

7:30am – Head downstairs for cheerios and coffee.  She doesn’t eat a ton right in the morning and this is more for me to get my act together and make some coffee.  Sometimes she will eat half a banana at the same time.

8am – We PLAY!!!! I sip coffee and watch my favorite Fox News channel show and she crawls around on top of me. We read books and play with colored blocks and just ease into our morning.

9am – Down for nap #1. Mom cleans up the cheerio mess and picks up toys.  I am generally feeling awake by this time and get out my to do list to start tackling my day.  I plan everything out, maybe do a load of laundry, make the bed, and scrub my face and teeth.

10am to 10:30am – Reagan wakes up and we kick off the active part of our day.  We run errands, do grocery shopping if needed, go to my favorite Pure Barre Mommy & Me class on Wednesdays, and Thursdays we do story time at the library.

12pm to 3pm – Depending on our schedule and how long we are out of the house will dictate when Reagan goes down for her second nap.  We just roll with it and I put her down as soon as we get home.

3pm to 5pm – Wakey Wakey little peanut.  She always sleeps hard, and I mean hard, for her second nap.  She wakes up disoriented and cranky most days.  She sometimes is shaky and hates being around people at this time.  After 3omin. or so she is back to her normal happy little self and we play, read, and practice walking.  Sometimes we’ll take the puppies for an afternoon walk with daddy.

6:30pm – Dinner time for Reagan.  She loves eating and will sit and eat her food with us as a family. She tends to get extremely goofy as she gets tired and has normal toddler behavior.  Things get goofy and more wild and thats are cue for bed time.  We alternate who does dishes vs bath time.  She plays in the bath and gets those last bits of energy out.  We put her down immediately after and she is out by 7:30pm every night.  Very rarely she’ll fuss for a few minutes in the middle of the night.  We let her self soothe and she goes back to sleep almost right away.

11 months reagan

MILESTONES & PLAY: Playtime and her new active lifestyle really have me going on all cylinders.  When she isn’t sleeping, she is going 100% full force all the time. She is sooooooo BUSY crawling all over the place, is always up and down on furniture, has learned how to dance, and rolls around everywhere giggling constantly and kicking her chubby feet. It is so much FUN, but so much WORK!!! We have been doing Montessori type activities and she loves it.  We do colors and play with wooden blocks, she does letters and we practice making sounds and words.  She is extremely drawn to small objects or the smallest details on something, so we practice touching and finding them.  She loves reading books and can turn the pages on board books.  So I read, she turns the pages, and we touch all the small details on the pages and learn what they are. She sets the pace and when we’re done, we’re done!

As far as milestones go, she has officially mastered crawling, pulling herself up, can walk with assistance although we are working on keeping her heels down, she can clap her little hands and is imitating our sounds and movements.  She had her first dance session and crushed it to “Staying Alive” by the BeeGees. I actually got the whole thing on video and couldn’t believe my eyes. It was FANTASTIC.  We do table food, sleep through the night, are down to 3 bottles a day, and she is pretty good at independent play.

ONE is right around the corner baby girl and we are so proud of your little self!!!!!!

xo xo,

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Categories BABY

Nine and Ten Months of Reagan Marie

Wow, time is continuing to simply fly by.  I can’t believe we are already cruising into the new year and I’m totally NOT READY for 2017 and all the adventure that the universe has in store for us.  Reagan officially turned 10 months old on January 2nd and is the cutest little chunk on this side of the Cascades.  In November she turned 9 months old and we filled the month with lots of fun, food, family, and a very THANKFUL Mommy! We celebrated Reagan’s first Thanksgiving with a small get-together at our house. Amidst all the confusion and chaos we managed to squeeze in a few family walks, lots of snuggles from grandparents, and I got to dress Reagan up in her first holiday outfit.

December was very jolly and brought with it all the traditional hustle and bustle of the holidays.  I literally can’t remember most of the month due to shopping, wrapping, and baking with the exception of Reagan’s first Christmas Eve and morning.  Those images and feelings will forever be imprinted in my brain and heart. Holidays with kids are infinitely more exciting.  It was fun and festive and now Mommy has about 5lbs. to lose in the new year. We are so grateful for this little family of ours and are just so excited for everything the universe has in store for us as we welcome 2017.

Here is our sweet little sugar plum at 9 and 10 months old…

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PEDIATRICIAN CHECK-UP & GROWTH: Reagan is officially 10 months old and will go in for her check-up later this month. We have the dreaded shots which are never fun.  She is so smart and I think she is going to understand that we are poking her and making her hurt. This breaks my heart but its good for her to get vaccinated. Just our opinion as parents, to each their own when making decisions for their children. She feels so heavy when I pick her up. I know we are quickly getting to at least 20lbs. or more.  She is such a little thing in terms of height and she has these teeny tiny little baby feet which I just love.

EYE COLOR, HAIR COLOR, & ONE CHUNKY BABY: Her hair is slowly filling in and is getting darker as the weeks go by. Her eyes remain blue and she has the most enviable eye lashes of all time.  Whenever we go anywhere, people will comment on her lashes and how beautiful her eyes are. Its so sweet. But is usually followed up with how adorably fat and chunky she is. Still a compliment in my book. A fat, smiley, happy baby is just about the best thing in the entire world.

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SLEEP: 9 Months was an absolutely glorious turning point for sleep!!!!! First off Reagan sleeps through the night. Like 12-13 hours of sleep EVERY… SINGLE… NIGHT!!! This of course means Mommy and Daddy are sleeping through the night as well.  It is such a miracle to feel rested and relaxed again.  In addition to a restful nights sleep, Daddy has figured out the perfect napping system.  Miss Reagan now takes 3 naps a day, one of which is 3-4 hours midday. WOW WOW WOW!!!!  She has been consistently taking a 45 minute morning nap, a 3-4 hour midday nap, and a 30 minute evening nap on top of sleeping 12-13 hours every night.  Its like my life and schedule opened up and I forgot what it felt like to be an actual human!!! Suddenly I have time to do the things I enjoy again.  My husband is an absolute lifesaver and I am so grateful for him and this amazing sleeping schedule.

We got a little off track around the holidays but are slowly getting back into our old routine.  We had a few awesome 4am and 5am wakeup calls around Christmas and she has been demanding a bottle at 5am everyday.  But then she goes right back to sleep and won’t wake up until 7:30am or 8am.  Any progress we make, and that involves a little more sleeping and a lot more consistency, is a major WIN in my book.

FEEDINGS: We have had a major transition in the eating department and are almost completely OFF baby food. No more trips to Target to stock up on jars and punches of baby food for this mama! WOOHOO!!! A few months back we started transitioning to more solids foods like puffs and soft bananas. Now, even though she has zero teeth, she is eating like a champ.  We watch her very careful and cut everything up really small.  Now the trickiest part is providing her a completely balanced diet filled with all the nutritional requirements.  Why can’t we all just eat cheerios with our fingers too?  We are slowly introducing new foods and are keeping an eye out for any allergic reactions, but in reality we are totally winging it and just giving her anything that makes sense at the time.

For breakfast we started with basic baby oatmeal and introduced some soft fruits and apple sauce etc.  Now we do eggs, oatmeal, cut-up fruit like strawberries, bananas, and blueberries, yogurt, small pieces of toast, apple sauce, or anything else that sounds good to me at the time.  We’ve stayed away from citrus fruits, peanut butter, and honey and won’t give those a try until after she turns a year old.

For lunch we started with infant rice crackers (also good for teething, just watch out for them shoving the whole damn thing in their mouth), cottage cheese, soft fruits like the pre-made fruit cups that are basically just sugar but help them get used to different textures etc.  Now we do small pieces of cheese, cut-up soft veggies like green beans or corn, mac n’cheese, tater tots, and bananas.

For dinner we originally kept it easy like infant oatmeal, bits of pasta and veggies. Lately we’ve been trying to incorporate more protein like small bits of chicken or fish. She did try steak which made me super nervous, because it is hard to chew when you have no freakin’ teeth, but she did GREAT!!!! She loved prime rib and mashed potatoes over Christmas and is obsessed with bread and cheese like her mama. She even enjoyed her first ever french fry over Christmas and then again on New Years Eve. And we rounded out the year with my 29th birthday on New Years Eve were she enjoyed her first ever piece of birthday cake!!! She was definitely a fan.

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SCHEDULE: Our schedule over the holidays has really gotten off track. But we have high hopes for the new year!!! Enough said…

MILESTONES & PLAY: We have really plateaued in terms of milestones but are on the verge of several big breakthroughs.  Reagan has been wanting to crawl and walk for months now. Over Thanksgiving she tried and tried but would always end up flat on her belly. She kicks her little legs and wants to move so badly, but no such luck. Then a few weeks into December on a random Sunday morning she just started crawling across the living room floor. I was literally shell shocked and couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  She acted like it was no big deal and the belly dance she had been doing for months was in fact the same as the crawling she was now doing.

We officially took the “safety” plunge with her new mobile activity.  Baby gates, locks, and electrical outlet covers have been ordered and installed.  I am still amazed at how much crap we have that she finds to get into.  She especially loves the dogs water bowl, any loose cords, the outlets (which are now covered), our household plants and the entertainment center.  And yet she has no interest in the stairs, the bar cart which is still fully loaded with xmas crap and wine bottles, or the fire places.  I know these things are coming and my new rule is “eyes on the baby 24/7.” If she isn’t in her high chair or playpen, I literally have to watch her like a hawk otherwise she is gone around a corner or has found something to get into.  Its a learning process for both of us and each day we fix something that isn’t safe that she has found.

We have slowly been transitioning to more active playtime where we practice walking, crawling, and climbing on things. She can sit, stand, and is almost able to clap her chubby little hands.  She says “Mamamamamama” and “Dadadadadadada” and the occasional “Babababababababa.” You know, the important stuff.  She is learning that if she cries we come running, and then she busts up laughing and giggling.  We are really going to have to start upping our parenting game.  She loves the puppies and will roll around on the floor with them for hours. So cute. We give them extra kisses and love every night and thank them for being so awesome and patient with the baby.

She thinks we are her own personal jungle gym and loves to crawl all over us. Its just part of the parenting gig I suppose.

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I can’t believe you are already so close to turning ONE baby girl! We love you endlessly!

P.S. This means I am officially caught up with “Reagan” posts. Hell to the YEA!!!!

xo xo,

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Categories HOLIDAYS

Merry Christmas 2016

Happy New Year! I hope you all had a completely wonderful and magical holiday season. We really reined it in this year and kept Christmas and New Years Eve extremely low-key. We were of course so excited to celebrate Reagan’s first Christmas and New Years, and did manage to play up the holiday season just a bit and make it as special as possible for the little lady.

We went to my in-laws house for Christmas and had so much fun enjoying all the festive activities. It went by in a blur and once again I am so thankful I was busy snapping pics and video left and right.  I know it can get a little annoying until you check out all the adorable footage I manage to capture.

christmas img_8458“Santa Loves Me” Onesie // ELF Booties  // Red Flower Headband

We arrived close to Christmas Eve and Miss Reagan did very well in the car. She is such a good little traveler and we had excellent weather which was a huge relief.  We were packed to the brim with presents, luggage, and baby gear and thank goodness we managed to arrive in one piece. We spent Christmas Eve with family, just hanging out enjoying each other and all the cuteness that Miss Reagan provides. We had a delicious prime rib dinner and Reagan enjoyed her first ever taste of mashed potatoes. She was in heaven.  We spent lots of quality time with Jeffrey’s grandparents and were able to do our annual Christmas Eve Pajama tradition in person this year.  Santa got extra excited this year and included the guys for the first time. Rumor has it, they are enjoying the xmas jammies even more then we do each year.img_8401

img_8402Gift Tag via Pinterest HERE

Every year I have so much fun picking out the coziest pajamas for us to wear on Christmas Eve. I usually go with Gap or Old Navy because they are always on SALE and are the softest, warmest, and long lasting. This year, I was obsessed with anything in red and black buffalo plaid prints and Reagan even got in on the action. She ended up wearing a pair of boys pajamas, but what the heck, it turned out sooooooo cute. She can pretty much rock anything.  Throw on a little red flower headband and she was ready to go for pics. Clearly we have way TOO MANY dogs…

img_8464Miss Reagan was way out of her normal routine and that of course means her sleep schedule was out of whack as well. She woke up at 4am on Christmas Eve and didn’t want to go to bed one bit. The child barely napped to add to the fun. It was way too exciting knowing that Santa was coming and that there was a pile of presents with her name on them. One of our Santa’s fell asleep very early because he was the one who woke up at 4am with her.xmasimg_8414Christmas morning was completely MAGICAL!!!! With the one exception of a certain little christmas elf waking up at 5am.  This time it was my turn to hang out with her, so we watched The Christmas Story on TBS and cuddled on the couch.  Eventually the rest of the family woke up and we enjoyed a nice breakfast together before heading into the living room to open gifts.  I wasn’t sure what Reagan was going to think of all the gifts and had to majorly “check” my mom expectations before we got started. She is after all, only 10 months old and doesn’t really understand what is going on.  After a quick photo of our first Christmas as a family of three, we let Reagan have at it opening presents and tearing wrapping paper. This was clearly the most interesting part for her, but her little face did light up at a few different toys including the best ever giant stuffed giraffe that Santa left for her. img_8421img_8432img_8436img_8444

 She got everything on her wish list, including a few extras, and Mommy and Daddy were very spoiled as well. I’m already super excited for next Christmas when she will understand what is going on a bit more.  But I really tried to remain present in each moment and soak up every second of her first Christmas as a sweet little baby. Next year will be so different, she will practically be a little girl already, and I am so grateful for this year and everything we have been blessed with, especially her cute little face.

Overall, it was a wonderful Christmas filled with relaxation, family, tons of dogs, buffalo plaid everything, and way too much food. Christmas Day was all about recovering and just spending as much time together as a family. I currently still have my decorations and tree up, and am sorta dreading/can’t wait to take everything down. It feels so daunting right now but I know i’ll love the clean empty look of our house for the New Year.

I am so NOT ready for 2017 but need to get my “ish” together because it has arrived.

Merry “late” Christmas FRIENDS!!!!!

xo xo,

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Categories HOLIDAYS

Christmas Gift Guide for Baby

I think it goes without saying but little Reagan Marie has been a very good girl this year. I have a sneaking suspicion that Santa is going to be very good to her. I decided to put together a little gift guide with some of the ideas I found for Miss Reagan. Being that this is her first Christmas, we are just so excited to see her little face light up when she gets all her goodies.  She will most likely be totally pumped about the wrapping paper, bows, and nothing else. We decided to go with the easy “something to WEAR, something to READ, something you WANT, and something you NEED” formula for her gifts. She is in desperate need of a winter coat and slippers, is always down for books and new toys, and mommy kinda WANTED her to have to cutest little elf slippers i’ve ever seen.  This age is so much fun to shop for but a little tricky at the same time.  We went easy on the toys and aimed for mostly useful items that we can use over and over.  She is getting bored of her baby toys so having a few new things around will be great for her and we were in desperate need of a few new bath toys to keep her occupied and entertained.

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Melissa and Doug Geometric Stacker     BabyGAP Pink Puff Coat     BabyGAP Cozy Elf Booties     UGG Bixbie Baby Booties     The Day the Crayons Quit     HAPE Color and Shape Sorter     Fair Isle Christmas Pajamas     Munchkin Bath Letters     Baby Lit’s A Christmas Carol

And in the parental department I like to think we’ve been very good “kids” as well. You’re never too old to believe in Santa and you gotta be GOOD to earn that visit from the Big guy!!! Here are a few things that are on our adult wish list this year…

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FOR MOMMY: 

Canon Rebel T6i     FitBit Charge 2     Threshold Izon Silverware Collection

Anthropologie Latte Bowls     Ceramic Berry Basket

FOR DADDY:

Philips Sonicare Toothbrush     Nike Men’s Metcon 2 CrossFit shoes     Kindle Fire

Lulu Lemon Gift Cards     Underarmour Men’s Athletic Gear

These Santa’s Elves are completely FINISHED with their Christmas shopping and are so grateful for Black Friday deals and online shopping.  The stockings are hung, the halls have been decked, and we are just so excited for all the festive FUN! Now we need to hit the hill for some sledding in the SNOW and I can’t wait to bake Christmas cookies with Reagan for the first time.  I’ve been waiting for our first Christmas with kids since the day I found out I was pregnant and have been playing Holiday music since the day after Halloween. Bring on all things Christmas and Festive!!!!!

xo xo,

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